Session 1 Edit

Beltarne chooses poorly.
Beltarne: shield is gonna take too long, if I move and attack, could i step to rat on horse, go to standing, and attack capped at 9?
GM: sure! don't hit the horse!
Beltarne: Swing! Miss!
GM: oops, do you hit the horse? Yes.
Beltarne: Great.
GM: the horse screams and collapses as you carve into it. The nymph's going to be mad at you.
Beltarne: "Gorm forgive me. Heal ya later, horsy!"

Tactical decision making at its finest.
GM: Sithis, your turn.
Sithis: ok. a moment, I thinking
Sithis: I attack the rat in front of me
GM: Genius!

Arganyev discovers why we don't fight while lying on our backs.
Arganyev: Yes, a rat is challenging me in close combat!
Lenia: Think of it more like 'A biting, squealing, twisting thing about the size of a five-year-old is on your chest and trying to eat your eyes.' - it puts things in perspective.

Arganyev grasps the meaning of 'adversarial GM'.
GM: Rat attack! as they bite Arganyev's face. Two hits!
Arganyev: You are enjoying this!
Beltarne: We all are.
Lenia: Of course he's enjoying this, he's a DF GM.

Beltarne returns to the horse he inadvertently attacked.
Beltarne : I guiltily groom [the horse] before bedding back down.
Ricka: "I hate you, you runty would be murderer!"
Beltarne: "I dinnae know what ye're talkin bout. Show me where the beastie is hurt? I don't see any holes. And I promise to buy the poor thing some carrots an apples, soon as we get back tae town."
Ricka: "Here, where you put your axe in it! Before you used your dark satanic pleas to make it look better!"
Lenia: "He was trying to defend the poor creature, and he's healed it. All the same, Beltarne, let Ricka do her job. I'm not sure the horse likes you."
Ricka: "She doesn't! She doesn't like runty axe murders at all!"
Beltarne: I see no holes. You must have imagined me trying to remove its leg." waves hands wildly "This is nae the short an handsome axe wielder ye are lookin foer!"
Ricka: "Harummph!"
Loegaire: "Ah yes. The battle axe. A refined, precise sort of weapon..."

More excellent tactics
GM: combat time. Sithis, roll perception for your danger sense.
Sithis: I kill the narrator, can I? :)
GM: No =)

Arganyev was badly bitten by rats in the face
Arganyev: I ready my shield, my sword, and my face...

Beltarne and Lenia are discussing what do about a pair of wounded, flesh eating apes that just attacked the delvers.
Lenia: "Beltarne, help me here? They'll die if we just leave them."
Beltarne: "Aye, they will, an' thats what nature is all about, init? The strong survivin, the weak being killed by those that have opposable thumbs an metalcraftin'!"

Loegaire and Lenia continue the discussion.
Loegaire: "Have you given any thought to what you're going to do with an injured giant killer ape? 'Cause I know what we can do with a dead one..."
Lenia: "I'm surprised you can be so callous about it, Loegaire. They're creatures of nature just like us."
Loegaire: "Right. Except for the very important point that they tried to kill us!"
Lenia: "Were trying. Aren't now. Someone get the rope out of my pack."
Loegaire: "You want to hold a benefit for the plight of the giant killer ape? Great. You want a whip-round for a battered killer ape shelter? Fine. You want to heal the killer ape, then sleep next to it? You and me got a problem."

Beltarne demonstrates a keen understanding of nature
Beltarne: Are there any body parts on these things that might be worth something?
GM: Roll Naturalist (default IQ-6) to figure that out.
Beltarne: Failure! I think their blood cures cancer.
GM: You can't imagine why anyone would care about anything from nature for any reason whatsoever.

Session 2 Edit

Thog proves to be useful.
Narrator: The goblin's boiled leather armor fails to stop the small javelin that Thog launches at him. He drops to the ground, bleeding out from a gaping chest wound.
Beltarne: heh. Thog's kind of handy.

Thog proves to be dangerous.
Narrator: An arrow almost hits Thog's heart, then veers off for no obvious reason other than Lenia's sudden chant. the other just grazes his skin, leaving an insignificant bruise.
Thog: "Huggies for the Mage!"
Lenia: "Please, God, no."

Singeon and Lenia clarify roles.
Singeon (yelling to Lenia): "Bring my pack!"
GM (aside): Apparently, you're his porter. who knew?
Lenia: "There are something like three backpacks on the ground here. I can't even bloody lift them all, you lunatic!"

Arganyev has been knocked over, again.
Lenia: For a holy man, Arganyev spends an awful lot of time working on his back.

Thog proves to be disturbing.
Lenia: I was raised by a delver. I loot the bodies.
Thog starts stuff one of the gobbo corpses into a sack.
Singeon: "Hey, what for, Thog?"
Thog: "Lunch."
Lenia: "..."
Beltarne: "bleargh, they're all yours my large friend"
Singeon: "you don't have to offer me any. Already ate!"
Lenia: "We have perfectly good rations, Thog. We'll even share."
Sithis: "Thog cannot eat goblins, at least in front of Lenia."
Thog: "Lenia want some Gobbo?"
Lenia looks pale. Paler. That's a feat.
Sithis: "No, Lenia don't likes people eat others creatures."
Lenia: "Actually, if he wants to eat the goblins I haven't got any moral objection. It's just the aesthetics of it. Goblins stink."
Thog: "If you gots other food, Thog leave gobbo here. No like the taste, anyway. Not like Halfling... yummy!"

Thog proves to be quite useful.
Sithis: "I want the crossbow."
GM: You can't cock it Sithis - it has a metal bow and is too strong for you.
Thog: "Here." Thog cocks crossbow easily.
Sithis: "Well."
Thog: "Dere."
Beltarne: "Thog sure is handy."

Singeon wishes he had more CPs.
Narrator: Though the delvers looked, they couldn't see anything in the shaft - most of them could barely see it at all.
Singeon curses his human eyes

The GM knows all
Singeon: Singeon stops crouching. Wants action. Does a full move.
GM: About time, Mr. overconfident.

The GM tells it like it is
Singeon: Move and attack- dual sabers - wild swings. Miss by 6 and 4.
Singeon: Oh well.
GM: You totally kill that evil wood block holding up the ceiling. The goblin, not so much.

Paranoia, self destroyer
Narrator: Ahead of you, there is a small opening near the canyon floor.
Singeon: "I feel like we are being watched."
Lenia: "You always feel like we're being watched."

The delvers object to the narration again.
Narrator: Elated on their effortless victory, the delvers plunged into the mines.
Thog: Crawled
Lenia: Effortless? I'm down like 6FP here. It's like a marathon.

Session 3 Edit

Thog is easily tricked.
Arganyev: "We have an ogre in our back!"
Thog: "GAH! Where!"
Arganyev understands it is Thog!
Thog: "Oooh. Thog see what you did there..."

The delvers encounter crushrooms.
Thog (after taking a 4d hit): What kind of damage roll was that?
GM: Right, the crushrooms are weird mutant mushrooms with mouths on the top of their caps and insane strength. One of them is eating Sithis and another is preparing to eat Thog.
Sithis: And the "seta" [Crushroom] is happy? :)
GM: Oh. Uhm, it's making satisfied noises as it eats Sithis, I suppose.

Lenia continues to argue with the narrator
Narrator: The situation is desperate! Even the mage is forced into physical combat as the crushroom focus on eating Thog!
Lenia: To heck with 'forced'; it's just far more efficient. Apparently I can't pick a spell list to save my teammates' lives.

More crushroom fun
Arganyev (shouting encouragement): "Stand up and fight, Thog! Don't be crushed by flesh eating vegetables!"
Singeon: Bit of philosophy, that is.
Sithis: I'm unconscious, but I dream with Lenia healing the seta.... sense of the nature... ug...
Lenia: "Actually, I'm pretty sure these are fungi, which are neither animal nor vegetable. That said, they're walking around and trying to eat us, so I'm not sure how to classify them."
Singeon: Classification: Thog like (eats people)
Lenia: Mushroomicus Eatingussicus.
Beltarne: Ohshitthey're strongasaurus.
Singeon: That's it, I'm learning taxonomy when we get back to Polisberg.
Singeon: I charge the crushroom, hit it twice, and do 16 damage. "Take that varmint we cannot classify!!!"

Sithis takes action after being knocked unconscious
GM: Sithis, your turn.
Sithis: dream....
GM: Right, right.

Thog is a brawler
GM: You knock it down and it stops moving.
Thog: "HAH!"
Arganyev: ! defeated with a Thog PUNCH!
Thog: Thog right hook!

More taxonomy studies
Singeon: "Die.... unclassified creature!!!"
Lenia: "Fungus."
Sithis: "or seta."
Arganyev: "that was Tofucthulu"
Thog: "Setaplastante!"

The delvers need to get up the chimney in a hurry
Thog: Can I ready Lenia?
GM: Yes.
Lenia: No. o.o;
GM: Are you stopping him, Lenia?
Thog: "Don't worry. Me aim."
Lenia: "I'd rather not be thrown?"
Arganyev: "Don't worry, it is exciting! Beltarne, throw up Thog!"
Beltarne: "I'll get right on that."

The GM only provides so much sympathy
Beltarne: "Hurry, lass! Our friends be needing us!"
Lenia: "If I could climb faster, I would!"
Arganyev: Climbing is slow
GM: well, yes. Sorry.
Arganyev: Thog could make the thing faster . . .
Lenia: If people hadn't run ahead and tripped an ambush, the party would still be together and climbing wouldn't be an issue.
GM: Well, yes. Not so sorry. =)
Arganyev: We can discuss that while the children rips our throats here ;)

Dungeon physics can be strange
GM: You can just climb up the chimney, Thog.
Thog: You said I wouldn't fit?
GM: No, just that you couldn't jump.
Arganyev: anxiety makes you thinner
GM: All dungeon passages are conveniently sized so you can, at least, barely fit through.

Session 4 Edit

Mark is showing pictures of his scarred face after being bit by a dog.
Demonsbane: I hope a good healing, without scar
Nate: Nah, chicks dig scars
Mark: But now we know what Arganyev looked like after the rats fed on him.
Nate: heh
Harald: Cars, Nate.
Harald: Chicks dig cars.
Nate: Tomato, tomato.
Nate: ...That really doesn't convey well in a written medium.

Lenia discovers that not Concussing your friends makes them happy. Who knew?
Narrator: The ball of concussive energy touches ground beneath the skull, and there is a loud thunderclap. The delvers blink, and when they look again, the flaming skull is completely gone.
Beltarne: Shaka-khan!
GM: And she didn't hit her allies, either. Weird. =)
Singeon is awed. That says something.

A discussion of tactics
Sithis: "but... why are there so many bodies in the floor, if the skull are so... feeble?"
Singeon: "Feeble? Only because I worked 'em down."
Lenia (shooting Singeon a glare): "Because who worked them down? And what's this --" she kicks at the torch, getting it away from the books "-- doing on the potentially valuable loot? Did you just forget that we were here to collect Dunner's writings?"
Singeon: "A distraction. It didn't work anyway."
Beltarne (slapping Singeon on the back of the head): "Think of better distractions, moron, preferrably one that doesn't send up $10000 in smoke."

Session 5 Edit

Simple questions, strange answers.
Singeon: "I don't want to camp here... i got a bad feeling. As always."
Arganyev: "Singeon, what is the worst can be happening?"
Singeon: "Some demigod is tracking me to torture me for 1000 years."

Delver wisdom
Lenia: Thoroughness is the road to profit and glory.

Singeon: Tunnels are dark, right?
Arganyev: and left: entirely lacking of any light.

Another discussion of tactics ends well
GM: Sorry! It's a swarm of wasps, not spiders. That makes more sense.
Singeon (whispering): "The snake is mine."
Lenia: "I don't think the snake is the problem. Those wasps may be, though."
GM: Uhm. Wasps. Yeah, they're angry too. They'll attack anything, except other animals due to interspecies courtesy.
Thog: "Thog not like getting bitten."
Beltarne: Create Air might be effective.
Lenia: Yeah.
Beltarne: Or center the Concussion on the wasps.
Lenia: I'd rather disperse the swarm.
Beltarne: Hippy.

The obligatory bit where people argue with the narrator
Narrator: Lenia speaks, and the walls ahead echo with thunder. Aside from wincing, Singeon and Sithis are unaffected, but the bats flutter in agony and run into walls.
Beltarne: You know bats actually have decent vision, unfortunately.
GM: Poetic license. and no, I didn't.

Strange questions, simple answers.
GM: Why does Lenia have more DR than Beltarne?
Lenia: Because I'm a munchkin.

Some questions are easy to answer.
Narrator: Rocks continue to pour from ceiling, rapidly getting larger and larger, until a cascade of rocks larger than your heads half-fills the tunnel. Anyone standing beneath that mass would be crushed!
Narrator: Thin cracks spread out on the floor, racing towards you, and more pebbles begin to drop from the ceiling.
Singeon: Can we run past it?
GM: Past the 4' tall mound of rocks? No, running past that would be hard.

Some rules are easy to explain
Arganyev: run!
GM: your move is 4.
Arganyev: I add 1 yard more, for sustained running?
GM: Not on uneven ground while tremors are knocking rocks out of the ceiling and it's dark.
GM: Just saying.
Arganyev: yes, I remember that now.

Sometimes the situation is desperate, with a cherry on top.
Narrator: A faint light shines ahead of Sithis, illuminating the way that the tunnel floor gives way sharply. In front of her, a chasm. Behind her, the tunnel collapses.
Narrator: Also, there's a swarm of wasps.

Some questions are very hard to answer
Wasps: The wasps swarm Thog.
Arganyev: "What a demonic bent in ignoring their own fear and biting to us to our deaths!"
Wasps: More wasps swarm Arganyev and Beltarne.
Wasps: Each of them takes 1 damage.
Arganyev: "Isn't this a bit strange? Sure the Tome has something to do..."
Sithis: "The tome is mine! remember!"
Lenia: "No, I think we've just pissed off a really large swarm of wasps by bringing a cave down on their heads."
Singeon: "You think?"

Session 6 Edit

Lenia doesn't handle pain well.
Lenia: What I want to say: "There is a rope. There is time to use the rope. Stop panicking." What I actually say: "OH GOD GET IT OFF GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!"

The GM is cruel
Singeon: I can jump 19 feet
GM: You can probably make it in 1 go with a Jumping check.
Singeon: Okay
Narrator: Singeon leaps into space!
Singeon (yelling): "I never miss"
Sithis: and??
Arganyev: success?
GM: Dunno, he doesn't land until next turn =)
Singeon: Tease.
Arganyev: that is suspense

Thog leaps across the chasm immediately after Singeon
Sithis: Thog, don't jump, please,perhaps the others need of your help
GM: He's gone, hurtling in the air.
Singeon: He gonna crush me, ain't he?
Thog: Yup
GM: Likely.
Narrator: Singeon touches down on the far side, safely.
Thog: Safe is such a relative term...
Arganyev: jump back and try again!
Singeon: I want to acrobatic roll out of anyones way that may land on me
GM: Sure, all-out defense and a turn. I'm good with it.
GM: You land and flip to see what's coming - mainly, Thog.
Arganyev: The Ogre Menace

Assigning blame
Arganyev: I remember the beautiful days, before these Thunderclaps... All was so easy, our lives so comfortable...
Lenia: "It's not my fault notbody noticed the cavern was unstable! Get these bats off me!"

Singeon has convinced the others of his importance
GM: You see - a door. Light shines from above, from no visible source. It's just bright, like daylight.
Singeon: Magical, maybe?
Arganyev: its no more than your own spotlight, Singeon

Ogre-Dwarf hostility
Thog: Aim!
GM: what are you aiming at?
Thog: Other side
GM: you draw a bead on Beltarne.
Thog: That works

Thog isn't always helpful
Arganyev: I swing to the other side, or at least I try to do it
GM: well, you had a bad start, and swing out into the chasm, but don't quite make it to the far side. like a pendulum, you swing back.
Arganyev: I'm a pendulum. "Help me, Beltarne! push me to the other side!"
Beltarne: "Nae, laddy, that's not the way!"
GM: Beltarne attempts to push you or grab you or something but doesn't manage.
Thog: Tie rope to arrow, Thog Shoot Arganyev, pull him this side!
Thog: Yes?
GM: laughs hysterically
GM whispering to Thog: Good plan!

Clever planning doesn't trump poor execution
GM: The tunnel is just slightly taller than Thog. The door is a normal door, slightly taller than Arganyev. It has Polisberg hallmarks on it.
Thog: I poke the door with my staff.
GM: You hear a sharp hissing sound, like someone drawing in breath, from the far side, but nothing else.
Lenia: "I'm worried about what's on the other side of that door."
Thog: Poke the door again.
Singeon: I'm glad you are seeing things my way, Lenia.
Singeon: They are out to get us, you know.
GM: You guys hear faint clinking noises, like someone getting their gear ready.
Arganyev: ok, I agree about resting here, if cracks aren't pursuing us now
Lenia: "I don't think we have time to rest, people. A charge out that door could push us into the chasm."
Singeon: We may not have a choice
Sithis: I hide
Thog: Thog knocks on the door.
Thog: "Hello? Youse there?"
Arganyev: I wait
GM: No one responds. At the door, I mean.
Sithis: Thog, can you throw down the door?;
Thog: "Hello?" Thog Knocks again.
Singeon: "Candygram!"
Lenia: Have I got time to pull out a fresh vial of Paut? I really need the energy back.
GM: Sure, we're not on combat time.
Thog: "Gold delivery!"
Singeon: I don't need to be a tactical expert to know we lost the element of surprise here.

The delvers are anxious
Sithis: I enter in
Arganyev: we enter
Singeon: Im going!
Sithis: I enter more in
Singeon: I double enter.
GM: hey, crack monkeys - calm down a second while the GM explains what's going on.
Narrator: The delvers stepped into a room, apparently molded out of the living stone.
Thog: 'Crack monkeys?'
Singeon: Monster Manual V: South Central Creatures, I believe

Someone critically failed their Hidden Lore check
GM whispering to Lenia: Though this looks something like a Peshkali, it's actually a variant demon beast. You can't kill it's arms. You need to cut off the tail and the head. Also, don't get close - it has a stinking breath.
GM whispering to Arganyev: This is a peshkali. it's a guardian demon. you can't kill it until you cut off the arms. it the meantime, it will kill you.

Peshkalis are complicated
GM: sorry, had to look up a metric butt ton of rules there.
Singeon: That what GURPS is all about
Jake the Canuck: I believe that's metric butte-tonne

The GM is unsympathetic
Singeon: I have 2 HP left, I am at 1/2 move
Arganyev: Im at 1 HP ;)
GM: hmm. well, that's a problem. for you. fortunately, she's out of attacks.

Thog is cool, but so is the Peshkali
Thog: Fast draw arrow, shoot demon.
GM: from a prone position? with your allies in the way? cool.
Thog: ...Prone?
Lenia (Harald387): Failed the knockdown/stun check, remember?
GM: you fell down when you were stunned, like everyone else in GURPS rules.
Thog: I guess I can hold the bow sideways? Gangsta-style?
GM: you're a heroic archer. if you don't take a penalty for running, why take one for lying down? you don't get your Acc bonus, though.
Thog: Whoo-hoo!
GM: I really do think it's cool. you're at a -4 for Singeon being in the way, though.
Thog: ALL-OUT ATTACK: Determined... Success! by 5
GM: well.
Demon: Dodge... Success! by 1
Thog: twitch
GM: she's fast. did I mention she's fast?

Sithis gets creative
GM: you stab the circle. nothing happens except you mar it some.
Sithis: and the demon?
Arganyev: she is having good fun
Sithis: she feels something?;
GM: she looks at you and hisses, but is busy killing and being carved up by Arganyev and Singeon. If something happened to her, it isn't immediately apparent.

Silly question
Singeon: Step, Feint, Attack a Weapon Arm. There is a weapon arm available here, yes?
GM: Singeon, yes, six of them =)

Peshkalis are hardcore
Thog: This time for sure... Arrow goes in the bow:
Thog: Arrow goes in the demon:
GM: you drive another bolt into her. she seems annoyed... but not, you know, inconvenienced.
Singeon: Don't annoy her! Kill her!
Thog: Should I even bother with the damage?
GM: No. Supernatural Durability is a bitch and half.

Someone's right, someone's wrong
Lenia: "You idiots, this is Dunner's guardian demon. Take off her head and her tail!"
Singeon: "I did the head pretty good."
Lenia: "So do it again!"
Arganyev: "Her power is in her arms, Lenia!"
Lenia: "That would be for a normal demon! This one's different!"

We agree
GM: you cut into her tail, half severing it. she drags it limply on the ground now.
Singeon: wink at her. She can't have me no matter how hard she tries.
Singeon: I realize that made no sense.

Celebrating victory with bad puns
GM: her sword arms are all cut up - she's only get 1 good arm, with the spear in it. you proceed to whack it off.
Arganyev: how many arms remain? The spear one , and the shield one?
Thog: 0 arms remain.
GM: technically, the peshkali should survive for 1 more round with her shield arm, but she has absolutely no offense, so I think the 3 of you can remove a half-crippled arm.
Thog: She is officially 'armless.

Session 7 Edit

The GM argues with a player
Arganyev: "what is that book, again? More summoning mini-manuals?"
Narrator: The Tome is really more of a summoning macro-manual.

Lenia can be literal.
Singeon: "I vote we explore the door. My blades scream for blood!"
Lenia: "You should get that checked out by a cleric."

Sometimes a good idea isn't.
GM: As Sithis runs forward and down the steps, she notices all kinds of caltrops and spikes stuck in the stairs. She dodges them easily.
GM: one of the rotted boards begins to give, but she easily leaps over it.
Arganyev: I try to follow Sithis path, for avoiding caltrops as she did an instant before
GM: You don't step right... but your tough boots absorb the damage.
GM: You do manage to step exactly where Sithis did - on the weakened board - and it breaks beneath you, dropping you do the ground.
Sithis: Why I don't take damage?
GM: You're not taking damage because you see in the dark, weigh almost nothing, and dodge caltrops. Arganyev doesn't have these advantages.

Zombie: "grrrr" the zombie guardsmen stand ready. "arg" the zombie slingers twirl their slings and aim.
Arganyev: "Arg? What do they mean?"
Lenia: "They mean 'eat the holy warrior first', I'm sure."

The GM's disappointment leads to a discussion of professional standards
Zombie: 2 of the slingers release. one hits Thog, the other hits Lenia. Lenia may dodge.
Lenia: Deflect Missile.
GM: Yourself or Thog?
Lenia: Myself.
Lenia: Deflect Missile. Critical Success!
Arganyev: !
GM: fine, fine, by the way. both sling stones are deflected.
GM: Some days, it's hardly worth trying to kill a bunch of delvers.
Lenia: Well, we're professionals.
Arganyev: sure
GM: You guys almost forgot to loot a chest.

Bridging the language barrier
Sithis: bah, pig skeleton!
GM: Pig skeleton?
GM: whatever.
Arganyev: it was an insult, in Spanish, again...
Sithis: yes, a pig skeleton!
GM: I'll have to remember that one.

GM gets frustrated
Singeon: I wanna be a zombie
GM: then stop using luck when I hit you!

Fodder, worthies, and zombie hit points
Zombie: the zombie guard remembers he's a worthy foe, not a minion, and recovers from stun. though he is disarmed. drat.
Arganyev: so Skeleton B 3 is a "tough"? I mean, a worthy.
Singeon: He and i are dancing
GM: Yeah, these are worthies.
Arganyev: all them, including slingers?
GM: there's no point in having 8 million bajillion hit points if you fall down on a single hit.
Lenia: More importantly, IT means a lot less if one hit kills you. >.>

Honest and bragging
GM: Thog misses his target, but hits the zombie next to it.
Thog: "That not zombie Thog aim for!"
Lenia: "You're not supposed to advertise that, Thog."
Thog: "Thog honest! Not clever!"

Blowing holes in the language barrier
Sithis: I take my personal basis and I do fire for burn this zombie so heavy
GM: Say that again?
Sithis: I take my "personal basics" from my gear,
Sithis: and I do fire for to burn the zombie
Narrator: Sithis drops a knife and replaces it with an alchemical match, then uses the match to ignite the zombie. It begins burning and mostly stops moving.

Session 8 Edit

Scottish, Pirate, Swedish, something.
Beltarne: "Aye, I be morre than able to push forrwarrd. Bettar that we catch them unawarres now!"
GM (whispering to Beltarne): I see your pseudo-Scottish accent is as bad as mine.
Beltarne: (whispering): I have to be careful or I end up in Swedish chef territory.

Singeon: I run at Lobsterman 4 and running broad jump across water.
GM: The water is only knee deep, though.
Singeon: Don't wanna get my boots wet
Lenia: Translation: This gives him an opportunity to show off.

GM: Lenia blocks the shot and will be hit instead!
Lenia: Deflect Missile.
GM: I know that.
GM: Lenia's spell harmlessly deflects the attack.

Allies, obstacles...
Thog: can I see lob6?
GM: There's a lot of stuff in the way. Doesn't look like it to me.
GM: By "stuff", I mean Singeon and his dance partners.

Good roleplaying isn't always good tactics
Singeon: I acrododge!
Arganyev: "he dodges successfully, creating a neologism"
GM: Not wanting to have your arm broken and your crushed body tossed in the water, you jump out of the way.
Singeon: I consider that a wise choice. +5 cp for excellent roleplay!
GM: Ha. whispering to Singeon, Wise choices, and Singeon? More like -5 for poor roleplaying. =)

The enemy isn't helpful.
Arganyev: folks, anyway, I don't see any apparent exit from this damned "room", perhaps we should go out from here? These guys don't seem very cooperative in the idea of being defeated by us.

The delvers start agreeing with the narrator and arguing with each other
Narrator: The purple ball strikes Arganyev's back, and tendrils of energy crawl up his spine. As they touch his helmet, they shimmer and disappear. Arganyev shakes his head briefly.
GM: That was anticlimatic. Guess I'll just have to kill you.
Arganyev: ha!
Lenia: Welcome to my world, mister lobsterman wizard. :P
Sithis: do you want to kill Arganyev too??
Lenia: There are moments...
Sithis: yes, I know :)

We need a literary precedent
Sithis: just Gandalf says the others run against the Balrog...
Sithis: why us can't run out?
Singeon: Gandalf never fought lobsters
Singeon: Really not much of an argument, I know...

Session 9 Edit

Maybe Sithis has too many weapons
Sithis: in fact, I have nothing in my hands
GM: no, you had 2 silver knives, dropped 1, and drew a goblin knife.
Sithis: but, where are my knives? I don't know
GM: You have 1 in each hand, plus another 11 strapped all over your body.
Sithis: then, I have 1 knife in my hand... good, then I put it in the eye of lobster 6!
Lenia: Redefining 'overarmed'...

Good descriptions don't always equal good luck.
Lenia: All-out (strong) staff swing, telegraphed, for the skull of the helpless, badly wounded disgusting abomination against nature at my feet.
GM: Heroic!
Lenia: Some things just need a-killing. Proceeds to roll poorly, even using her luck.
Lenia: *cry*

What she said
Narrator: The last lobsterknight brings his blade back around and smashes it into Singeon's crossed sabers. Shards of ebony fly everywhere as the blade shatters.
Singeon (yelling): "I planned that!"
Arganyev: you don't need to say it!
Lenia: Singeon is clever, not honest.

Judging capabilities
GM: The last lobster knight loses control of his shield as he tries to flee. Then he's knocked around a bit. And, uhm, killed.
Singeon: "Thats a warning to our new friends!"
GM: The 4 new lobstermen take heed of the situation and dive back into the water.
GM: combat is over (I assume the 6 of you can kill 1 stunned, crawling, wounded elder spawn).
Singeon: I don't know about that!
GM: I'll take it on faith.

More language issues
Sithis: "Perhaps Beltarne?"
Beltarne: "Nae, I aen't got a kit on mae, but I think a lil' work wit' one oa Sithis' fine knives be thae thing."
Arganyev: "We need a more delicate surgery, mate."
Beltarne: "Aie be kennin tha cuttin', but on thae men, not on thae beasties."
Singeon: Do you speak common?
Beltarne: If I start going "Bork Bork Bork" I'm broken.

More delver wisdom
Sithis: "Guys! I find my knife and a lot of coins, look!"
Lenia: "Coins? We like coins. Coins don't require negotiation for value."

The ongoing debate
Singeon: "If you look closely at those stars over there, they are in the shape of me."
Lenia: "You should probably get your eyes checked along with your swords."

Singeon: Fast-draw rapiers and move like a thing that moves fast!

A failure to agree on the course of action
Lenia: "Hang back, everyone. I think I can probably talk some peace into them."
Singeon, Arganyev, and Sithis charge forward.
Lenia: "You guys have such an excellent grasp of 'Hang back'."
Arganyev: Lenia is very able to make a negotiation, folks
Sithis: with bandits? I disbelieve
Arganyev: well.... I move forward, running all the possible with my shield raised for cover!
Lenia: You know, I have the strangest feeling that it'll be difficult to convince them a peaceful solution is possible.
Lenia: What with the insane people charging towards them with bared steel.
Lenia: "We're going to have to work on the 'Hang back and negotiate" tactic, folks."
Sithis: I don't want negotiate! I'm bloodlust!!
Sithis: I don't want negotiate with bandits anyway

Negotiations are successful!
Bandit: "Give us your gold, or die!"
Beltarne: We haven't even ASKED if they'd like to negotiate.
Beltarne: Oh. Never mind. There's the negotiation.
Lenia: "Yes, something about insane people charging them with pointy things rather than trying to talk to them."

GM: Congratulations! You have defeated the defenses of the Caverns of Madness!